Sunday, August 31, 2008

"It's getting breezy here in New Orleans", she said..

I'm pretty terrified. Spoke with Buddyboy and Mrs. Buddyboy- they're staying in NOLA. I got fairly hysterical when he dropped this bomb.. He figures he's a doctor, he moved there because the people needed doctors and he's not going. So if he's not going, she's not going. "Oh we live Uptown, it doesn't flood here". Yeah well flying debris, lack of electricity, massive flooding everywhere else and looters might be something to take into consideration! Just sayin'.. And hell, NO ONE IS THERE!! All the smart people got the fuck out- so who ya gonna doctor there smart guy?? The last message was "There's not a soul in sight and it's getting rather breezy." Jesus, Joseph, Mary, Allah, Mohammad, Shiva, Kali, Buddha and all the rest of y'all please bestow the blessings of safety on his stubborn ass (and herself and the cats as well, especially my boy Elvis) I beg you!!

Where will we go with the cats he asks? The fucking Super 8 in Houston sounds good to me! Drive the fuck back to Virginia- somewhere, anywhere but there!!! But he's a stubborn, stubborn man, no amount of my hysteria is going to move him. I am trying not to obsess, the family took away the remote and has denied me access to the Weather Channel.

Mr. Charles and Edgar are safe at his sister's in Arizona enjoying a bit of a dry holiday. He was the smart one, he got out early! Doogie Houser MD and his family were en route back from a holiday in Mexico when all inbound flights were cut off- so they're stranded in Houston. Which is probably a good thing. Packing up the baby and the Pops and Mom and sitting in gridlock on the interstate heading for, why yes -Houston, would have sucked. Gonna make it really hard to sell the house however.. Pretty sick irony right on the heels of the Katrina anniversary, huh? But to their credit they are doing a pretty good job getting folks evacuated. With the exception of stubborn people. And even if they order mandatory evacuation, he's crucial hospital staff (He up and volunteered) so I guess it's too late now.

I hope all the residents of the Gulf coast and all the islands that have been so hard hit already come through this safe and sound! And here's hoping Hanna veers back out to sea and Gustav doesn't reach category 5 prior to landfall.. Even if you don't pray folks- think good thoughts.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Well that year just flew by..

According to Jeff's new math I'm 1007 today.. And I actually feel like it too.

I think I'll go treat myself to some moisturizer.. and a bottle of champagne.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Paging Miss Dora's Mojo!

Please meet the rest of your party at the courtesy desk.. Motivation, Organization and Confidence are waiting for you…

I’m treading water here dear ones, truly. Time was when I was motivated, organized and a force to be reckoned with. When my feet hit the floor in the morning Satan shuddered and said to himself “Oh shit! She’s awake!” What the hell has happened here? The sloth of working out of the house? I don’t think so really, I got things done in a timely basis. Old and lost my edge? Guess it’s possible. The last couple of months I seem to be simply reacting and putting out fires. Both domestic and professional. I’m procrastinating as opposed to organizing and dealing with the chaos. In short I’m a bloody mess and had best get my shit together in real short order. And I do mean REAL short order..

I really am looking forward to the new job- he’s a swell guy, I genuinely like him and get his vision. And this is the sort of challenge that once upon a time got me fired up, made me take charge, put on my big bitch pumps and make things happen. As opposed to feeling in over my head and overwhelmed.. And if I fuck this up, this nice earnest young doctor gets fucked (along with his family) in the process.. And mine too ultimately.

I really need to find my mojo- so if you see the bitch, please tell her to get her ass home pronto!!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Free to a good home-

16 year old female child. 4.65 weighted GPA, fairly well mannered. Smart mouth and perverse sense of humor. Serious inquiries only.

References required.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Whenever I'm feeling particularly ill tempered..

I walk out on the back deck and look at this view-

The world really can still be an awfully pretty place.

Off to play paintball with a gaggle of jacked up 11 year olds for the Hurricane's birthday. I expect I'll have to take a walk out to look at the view this evening..

Monday, August 04, 2008

I'm back Dear ones!!!

Much like Katrina, the brave souls of NOLA survived me hitting town too.. I had a ball! In spite of the ghastly heat, the rain, the oil spill and the grumpy husband (he had to actually WORK) I sashayed forth and had myself a fine time.

So the recap -cause I promised Tate, Wills and Tony. And fair warning to Al, syntax, grammar, punctuation and proper usage went right on out the door with this one honey..

The trip down was more or less uneventful. I however must state for the record I hate flying. Not the actual being in the air part, that bothers me not one whit. The bullshit that now accompanies getting in and out of the airport before one can actually embark or disembark one’s flight has become damn near unendurable as far as yours truly is concerned. The trip back? That's a whole 'nuther very long post in and of itself..

Anyhoo.. got in late, so we more or less grabbed a drink, ate and fell in bed. Sunday was hot, but pleasant- did a walkabout with the Beast. The heat was more than he could manage, so we decided to take in a movie just for the hell of it- not to mention the air conditioning!

Beastman had to start actually working Monday, so little ole’ me unleashed herself on the unsuspecting citizens of La Nouvelle Orléans for the rest of the week. Long, long meanders through the Vieux Carré. No particular destination, which in my opinion is the best sort of walk to take after all.. And lovely long strolls up St. Charles, turning left or right depending on the mood of the moment.

The thing I adore about NOLA, aside from the genuinely friendly folks, is the fact it’s one of those cities I always feel genuinely at home in. I like visiting LA, but I feel like a stranger in a strange land, ditto for NY (ironic that I lived there a bit) and Miami. There are a few cities however that I have instantly fallen in love with and could quite happily settle down in- Savannah, Charleston, San Francisco and NOLA. And oddly enough I am generally taken for a citizen of said fair cities when there, which says nothing about me, but speaks volumes about the manner in which I felt welcomed into those lovely places.

Yes, I digress, as usual..

So I ate, and ate and ate.. Dressed up, why yes I can tell you’re shocked. Indulged in retail therapy, had some fab cocktails- dang do I love Herbsaint and Sazeracs- boy howdy!! And walked an insane amount, given the heat.

OK, you’re bored- so the highlights..

Hanging with my dear sweet Buddyboy (and Mrs. Buddyboy)- numero uno and the entire reason I decided to be baggage on this trip. The new house is lovely. Up St. Charles and 4 blocks riverside on a street that discretion keeps me from naming.. We had a delightful visit and a long chat, followed by an exquisite late lunch at La Petite Grocery on Magazine St.. to die for!! Fantastic! Went back to the house and had another long chat fest before I had to head back downtown. As usual it was a bittersweet state of affairs, consisting of him joking about convincing me to move and me pointing out the painfully obvious.. Both of us managed not to cry. OK, I did get a bit teary on the streetcar, I admit it. It’s hard to be reminded someone that close to you emotionally is so far away physically. And we had a lovely lunch the following day and a bit shorter visit- not like the man can just stop working for me.. So I was happy as always to spend some time with my dear friend, and very sad at parting. Email and phone calls are all well and good, but for people that have known one another so long they can finish each other’s sentences and have a conversation with a few well-placed expressions, the distance can be a bit sad.

Went to Dickie Brennan’s for dinner with the big bosses (doing the charming wife thing- yes, I know that’s one hell of a stretch) and John Goodman held the door for me like a perfect gentleman.. He's really lost a lot of weight.

I met the most adorable retired drag queen, henceforth known as Mr. Charles. It was early in the morning and raining so my umbrella and I went walking. I think that’s a great time to see any city myself, as the tourists stay in. So I took a walkabout with no particular destination.

Way the hell down near the end of Chartres I see a very wet Scottie running down the middle of the street about to have an unpleasant altercation with a trash truck. The little guy way trailing a leash, so I just grabbed for it (sorry but I really had no desire to get squished either) and reeled him in. Thankfully do harm done! Well I checked the little guy’s collar and it said “Edgar” and had a phone number. Humm, since I had Monsieur Edgar, an umbrella and a bag in the pouring rain I decided to set off in the general direction he came from prior to trying the juggling act of dog, umbrella, bag and cell whilst reading his collar..

About two blocks down an older gentleman in a white linen suit (obviously bespoke) started with a pearl clutching wail of “Edgar, you nearly ended my life!!!” Well, I rightly assumed we had found Monsieur Edgar’s Daddy.

Well bless his heart, the dear thing thanked me and offered me breakfast and I really did attempt to refuse.. I think the term we’re looking for is “force of nature”. Granted I was going to walk him on home anyway since I had a dirty shivering doggie in my arms that would have totally trashed his suit,. and the old dear had both a cane and umbrella.. I agreed to walk home with him for the aforementioned reason but stated quite clearly that I had no intention of putting him out..

He clearly had other intentions, or merely chose not to hear me. My money is on the former as opposed to the latter.

We entered an apartment I can only describe as “apartment as a Fabergé egg”, or Diana Vreeland’s apartment in miniature. Nope, never been there, but I’ve seen enough pictures.

Well I was pretty well a soaked, muddy mess and terrified of the upholstery and carpets.. He tried to collect the dog but I opted to ask for a towel before letting Edgar near that suit! So, with Monsieur Edgar dried off, and comfortably being chastised (i.e.- loved within an inch of his little life) Mr. Charles instructed (I think demanded is closer) me to go dry off and wash up for breakfast. Let’s just say that was a Yes Ma’am situation.. Those of you that know me well realize I can be a bit forceful myself– so you can imagine the type of personality it takes for me to be obedient..

What an utterly delightful morning! After I tided up as best I could, Mr. Charles made me coffee, forced me to take a healthy snort of Herbsaint (to ward off a chill- umm humm) and took me on a tour of his precious apartment. Aside from the fact that it was absolutely gorgeous, the pictures were beyond fascinating! Mr. Charles and his partner (who passed in 2003) all over the world, Mr., Charles in full drag as a headliner in the late seventies through the eighties. Part of me felt so sad that he had lost his love of nearly 50 years, but part of me felt so happy that he had such a wonderful time- and frankly still was enjoying life. Anyway the old dear insisted on breakfast and I refused unless I cooked ;) So we fussed in the kitchen together. We came up with an unusual variation on eggs benedict, but it was pretty damn good if I do say so myself. An interesting morning, and a lovely new friend. Since he doesn’t do electronics, we’ll continue the friendship via snail mail. Damn, I hope my personalized stationary is up to snuff.. it's engraved, y'all think that will be OK??

*An aside- I did go back to say goodbye to the old dear before I left (and show him all the dresses I bought) and the hugs and tears made me feel like I really was taking leave of an old and dear friend, funny, huh??

Let’s see, after that I could recount all the meals in minutiae and so forth and bore you to tears (why yes, I am actually aware you probably got there quite some time ago) but let it suffice to say it was lovely, other than those couple of being the obligatory charming wife bits with the big bosses.. I had a hell of a good time.

I’m awfully pleased I talked myself into it.