Anyone have a spare Xanax?

Because losing my shit isn't a luxury I have at the moment..

The Beast is not out of the woods yet, but the doc is cautiously optimistic. They were able to re-sect a substantial chunk of his sigmoid and if he heals properly no colostomy! Which would be a good thing, I figure it beats dead all to hell, but I'm thinking the big fella would be most unhappy should that occur. Can't say I blame him. But still, I'd rather have him alive with the bag if that's my only option, thank you very much.

The kids are actually handling this pretty well, all things considered. More than a little freaked out that this happened exactly a week after Grandpa died, but dealing with the situation well actually. After hearing the tale (granted there's morphine involved, but I know my husband and it no doubt happened exactly the way he relayed it) he was having severe stomach pain, tried the hot bath routine, jacked himself up on an insane amount of RX strength Motrin(like a moron) and passed out in the bedroom- thankfully the dogs got quite upset by this and licked and whined it appears until he came to and could dial 911.. They A) Will be getting a steak for dinner tonight and B) I will never again bitch about the mountain of dog hair on the floor, I swear. Free pass for life.

Note to self, just don't leave him alone anymore, he always lands in the hospital or does something stupid..

Off to the hospital to check in on him, and then home to do some financial projections. While we are thankfully very, very lucky in that we're well insured- I know all too well that the final liability for this fiasco is going to be most painful.

What next????

Actually I really don't want to know.

Daddy's service was actually lovely- Miles Davis, some preaching and I didn't lose my shit during the eulogy. Went back to Brother #2's house to spend the night and had planned on spreading Daddy's ashes in a particular spot on the Blue Ridge Parkway he loved- The entire tribe was up, fed and ready to roll.. And I'm telling you, herding cats is easier..

And then my cell rang. The Beast went in for emergency surgery this morning got a trio of perforations in his intestines patched back together. He's stable, but guarded.

Man this has been one seriously shitty week.

Here we go..

My thanks to you all for your kind thoughts, hugs and calls and emails of the past few days. Each and every one has helped make things easier. However, as my email server freaked on me totally I lost a few that I had yet to have had the time to reply to (Al, that was so very very dear- my response will have to wait until I can reconstruct)but I will get to it eventually.

Time to finish packing and hit the road in the morning. Be well dears, all your kind thoughts are packed in the bag with me for the trip south. And again, my thanks.

C'est fini..

The Old Fart slipped away fairly peacefully late yesterday afternoon. He hopefully felt no pain, and I was holding his hand- in theory I guess he's at peace, I can only hope that's the case.

This one's for you Daddy, I know it's one of your favorites since you loved Herbie and Miles so much.



See y'all later, I have to go plan a funeral..

Of all medical oxymorons..

I’ve always found “actively dying” to be the most peculiar, I do suppose it’s apt after a fashion however, as the body is actively trying to get it over and done with.

Daddy is in the last lap. Thankfully after pitching a fit, he’s comfortable and on enough morphine that he prayerfully doesn’t feel a thing. While I’m sad he’s sliding into that morphine induced comatose state for my brother’s sakes- I refuse to allow this to be painful for him, he’s had enough pain the past few years. While I have some small amount of guilt for being his own personal PCA (as Buddyboy aptly put it) I did tell them 4 days ago to get the hell up here if they had anything to say to him- the fact that they waited till now isn’t my fault. As both of them know I don't kid about that sort of thing and I surely don't make pronouncements of that nature unless I'm pretty damn sure I'm right..

My little break for my head is nearly over, and I have to go back to being the family pragmatist (bitch) and make with more phone calls and arrangements and such before I head back to the hospital.

Be well my dears, and call someone you love today just for the hell of it.